This is the third in a series of posts on how normal business people can improve their business writing. If you need to catch up, refer to my posts on Rule #1: Make your most important point first and Rule #2: Write simple sentences.
Rule #3 is: Eliminate extraneous words. Edit out all those filler words that don’t add any meaning and just clog up the page. One of the phrases I hate most in business writing is “I would like to take this opportunity to…. “
I would like to take this opportunity to advise you that our annual customer meeting is coming up soon. We have now set the date for May 27 and are looking forward to hosting this extraordinary event at our new headquarters facility. We hope you can attend.
I hope you can join us for this year’s customer meeting, set for May 27 at our new headquarters facility.
After an opening like that, it’s really easy to convey what’s going to make the event extraordinary and how great the new facility is.